When Family Becomes Everything: The Power of Being Held
Never have I truly experienced the powerful, almost surreal force of family more than during the time of my grandfather’s passing. (Technically, he was my great-uncle, but I’ve always seen him as a grandfather.)
The stories shared during his service are ones I’ll carry with me forever. As I listened to each of my family members speak, there was one undeniable thread that wove its way through all their reflections: a shared recognition of how deeply he understood the importance of family—of keeping us close, connected, and grounded in love.
Growing up, I took family for granted—plain and simple. I was always surrounded by family, supported every step of the way. My nuclear family has always been close and loving—and we still are.
Only now do I fully realize how deeply privileged I am—not just to have a supportive family, but to have a lot of family: aunts, uncles, great-aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, and of course, family friends who feel like family too.
I look back now with deep appreciation for all the family gatherings and birthday celebrations that brought us together. When I was younger, those moments simply meant the best of times—playing hide-and-seek with my siblings and cousins, sneaking chocolate, eating too much dessert, and of course, opening presents during Christmas, Easter, or our birthday months. Oh, the joy of being a kid!
Reflecting on it today, I’m truly in awe of how incredible my family—and extended family—really is. We didn’t have to gather every few months for birthdays. We didn’t have to host summer BBQs or attend every little celebration. It would’ve been easy to just see each other once a year at Christmas. But for my family, family is everything.
My aunts, uncles, and grandparents came to our soccer games, birthday parties, performances—even high school and college graduations. They showed up for the big milestones and the small moments, simply because that’s who they are. That’s who we are.
At the service, one of my aunts shared something that’s really stayed with me. She spoke about how, when she first joined our family, she was genuinely struck by how open, connected, and welcoming everyone was — especially my great aunt and uncle, the same uncle we were honoring that day.
She said not all families are like that — not all families make you feel like you belong the way ours does. And in her words, I felt the truth of something I’ve always known, but maybe hadn’t fully appreciated until now: how rare and special it is to be part of a family that truly shows up for each other.
We joke sometimes, “Be careful who you marry into,” but in all seriousness — it matters. The people you marry into become your home, your history, your support. And I realize now, more than ever, how lucky I am to have been born into a family that holds each other close, that welcomes others in with open arms, and that shows love in such quiet, consistent, meaningful ways.
Especially in moments of loss, that kind of connection becomes everything.
And I don’t think I’ve ever felt it more powerfully than during the week we lost my great uncle — when family showed up, leaned in, and held each other through the grief.
Familia, during my Nano’s celebration of life reception
